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The Games People Play
I am reading this educational book on relationships and attachment… The author took a moment to talk about people that play games in their romantic relationships. Game players… What jerks right? Wait… What did that just say? I am a game player? Yep… Me. A few weeks ago I made a post on Facebook and…
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Rejection Sensitivity
Today’s Ugly Truth is brought to you by Rejection Sensitivity… when your feelings are hurt because somebody looked at you funny. If I could teach you anything about Borderline Personality it’s this fact: Borderline folks have an extreme sensitivity to rejection. This is actual or perceived rejection. This is when your friend doesn’t call back.…
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Sometimes…
Sometimes I want to burn it all. The hurtful remark from family, the heartbreak of lost love, the unanswered text message… I think horrible thoughts of why I am the way I am… And if I just burned it all down I could walk away with a smoke marked smug face, knowing I never have…
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Manipulation Is The Key To Success
Manipulate is a verb. Here is the definition found by Google Dictionary: handle or control (a tool, mechanism, etc.), typically in a skillful manner. control or influence (a person or situation) cleverly, unfairly, or unscrupulously. Is this something everyone struggles with or is a special gift given to Borderline Personality peeps? There is no way…
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STOP
The last few weeks I’ve been reading a lot about borderline personality disorder. Most of the articles talk about how hard we are to deal with, and how we hurt the people we love often. Now that I understand why… how do I fix it? I sincerely have no idea how to proceed. Since the…
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This Could be Heavy #2.5
I updated this today 4\14\21. I am reposting this song (Weight of a Man) because I meant it. Joining me for this journey is not easy. This week I have been afraid, sad, manic, euphoric, dangerous, honest… I have discovered some really hard truths about myself and gained more understanding about Borderline Personality Disorder. I…
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I just got punched… Thank God
First I want to clarify after researching that lifeguards do not punch you. They are trained to swim up from behind and hold you by the neck. I just got punched. Not literally, I was told to not contact someone for 72 hours. In my past I have learned that people abandon you. Everything feels…
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Thank you for your patience
I wrote this in December 2019. I just came across it and felt I should share. I started this blog to communicate who I am and to encourage others that struggle. I hope this post shares both. I am feeling very rational at the moment… Which hasn’t happened in the last few weeks. I struggle with…
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Dear Mental Illness,
You are a bully. Not only do you hurt me, you hurt my family. You make my mom cry, and my friends scared. You keep me away from work, you encourage me to disengage from my life, and tell me to hide from my loved ones. But you have also shown me a few things……
The not so pretty truth 